Proper responses to every question

Questions starting with ´Why...´
(example: Why are you so ugly?)

-Because I´m a ninja!
-Because that stain is really gross!
-Because of that apple.
-Because Morgan Freeman is awesome.

Question starting with ´Where...´
(example: Where is the dog?)

-In your/my pants.
-At the zoo. Duh.
-In our mothership.
-In a place far away where nobody can hear them! °evil laugh°

Questions starting with ´What is a(n)...´
(example: What is a penguin?)

-A special kind of explosive duck.
-A russian pizza.
-A maggot that caught a cold.
-A question mark with a hat.